If you didn’t laugh at the plight of five petty crooks torn between copping a feel off a “Daddy got me here, pretty face will get me the rest of the way” pseudo-actress at every opportunity and simply breaking down and gang-banging her, surely you won’t fail to see the humor in watching them administer concussions and spinal damage to a crew of underpaid stuntmen with families to support pretending to be bad guys. Sit through the lame frat house humor and you’ll be treated to a really keen funhouse seqence where lots of people sustain grievous bodily injuries. Remember, though…the longer you suffer, the greater your reward. Others, like the quasi-epic phony burglary scene, do NOT work and will make you want to track down the parties responsible for conceiving such a thing with six rabid bloodhounds and a meat cleaver in each hand (“I’m allergic to rope”?!?). Most of the comedy scenes are just filler…some, like the Japanese restaurant bit, while not exactly being hysterical, at least work. Three action scenes in this movie…short one in beginning, short one in middle, long one at end. Had I known that beforehand, I would have bought it anyway since Samo kicks ass, but still…15 minutes of Jackie is 15 minutes of Jackie. There’s about 15 minutes of Jackie and 70 minutes of Samo here. However, it would have been nice and fair and decent and honest and ethical and TOTALLY unAmerican if this release had been packaged for what it is…a Samo Hung film which co-stars Jackie Chan…rather than what thousands of action-starved Johnny-come-lately peasants like me were looking for…a Jackie Chan movie that co-stars Samo Hung. Well, as anyone with half the intellect of a furry little forest critter burrowing in its own feces knows, nine bucks isn’t a great deal to pay for a video such as this. How many people, like myself, saw the Arena Home Video release of this movie in the martial arts section at Media Play and shelled out eight hundred and ninety-nine of their hard-earned cents (plus sales tax where applicable) for it, expecting to see a poorly-dubbed but still watchable ’80s Chan flick superior to Lo Wei’s excrement but second-rate compared to, say, Police Story? A show of hands, please? Ah…I thought so. “My Lucky Stars” Japanese Theatrical PosterĬast: Sammo Hung, Yuen Biao, Sibelle Hu, Jackie Chan, Richard Ng, Eric Tsang, Andy Lau, Michiko Nishikawa, Charlie Ching, Stanley Fung, Lam Ching-Ying, Bolo Yeung, James Tien, Yuen Wah, Fruit Chan Gor
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